I got a crazy idea this past Christmas to email a different image of ‘something’ for 12 days to everyone on my mailing list. My initial plan was to don hideous Christmas sweaters, but after doing the math, the sticker shock had me putting them back on the rack. Besides, Ugly Christmas Sweater parties are a better venue. So, I wandered around the thrift store until it hit me — 12 DAYS OF TASTELESS CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS! Here is a full recap:
Painted Pasta Tree with Chinette and Parkay tub base
Big Bottomed Bell Ringer
Platinum Blonde Angel with Blue Eyeshadow (picture the look on the Thrift Store employee’s face when I plopped this pretty thing down on the counter!)
Scum-filled snow globe (half empty)
Maimed cardboard reindeer cutout
Inebriated ceramic Santa head with light-up nose
Two blind caroling candles
Vintage Greeting Card—This is printed proof that if he sees you when you’re sleeping (and he likes what he sees) he’s sure to call you when you’re awake. Better watch out!
Horrified Girl with Wreath
Metrosexual Santa with black platform boots and matching bag
One-eyed partridge pot holder—minus pear tree
A snowman head shoved onto a green, wooden pickup stick
with matching wood base. Its tinsel-accented “body” resembles
a pre-fertilized ovum (don’t believe me, look it up). A festive
poinsettia collar pulls it all together!